Ideas

 Names

Sally Barry 

why should I break up with her?

Well id say shes proper mental, manipulative, doesn't let you do anything, isn't that good looking and is a miserable sod. But the main reason is that if you weren't with her youd do more drugs with us.

We see a close up of a man putting water in a kettle, he fills the kettle to the very top and switches it on, This is Vinny, he talks to Mike who is off camera. They both seem a bit slow and tired like they've just woken up, waiting for the kettle to boil. The room is dark, with pockets of light shine threw, making the space look warm and cold at the same time. 

 

Vinny 

You avin a Coffee Michael?

 

Mike 

Yeah, just milk in mine thanks 

Vinny opens up a few cupboards to find the cups, tea and coffee

Vinny 

Do you want one mate?

No reply 

We still only see Vinny get out the mugs and make the tea.

Vinny

Fair enough...Michael do you mind what mug you have? 

He holds out a sports direct mug and a Gromit mug 

Mike 

I'll have the sports direct one, bigger innit, I need it, I'm quite tired, didn't sleep very well 

Vinny 

No I didn't either, it was warm wan it, apparently its gonna get warmer this weekend 

Mike 

I need to buy a fan 

Vinny 

There's a spare one in the loft, I'll get it down later 

Mike 

Is it a big one or a shitty small one? 

Vinny 

No it's pretty big (he opens up his hands to show how big it is)

The kettle boils and vinny pours the steaming water into the mugs, and begins to make the tea and coffee

Vinny 

You know I'm not a fan of violence. I mean I like it in the films, love a good action scene. But real violence is different. I remember one of the first times I went aboard, I went to Benidrom, A group of us went, and I remember we were walking back from the main strip, It was early hours in the morning  and we saw a group of about 4 guys beating up this man, just in the middle of the street, And I mean they were beating the living daylights out of him, I dunno why, he was screaming in a different language and so were men kicking him, so I dunno what it was about. But I remember the mans bloody face and I remember feeling sick to my stomach, that another human being could do that to a person. But then you think don't ya... All humans have ever known is violence, its in our DNA. We've been killing each other since we were apes. Where would we be without violence? 

Vinny finishes the drinks and takes a sip He turns from the counter and faces the camera

Vinny 

ahhh - Here you are Mike 

for the first time we see Michael step into frame and drink his coffee 

Vinny

What you saying? Not too much Milk?

Mike

Not bad (he takes a biggish gulp and looks at the mug) Yeah that hits the spot 

They both look over to someone else off screen, around where Mike was stood

Mike 

He normally puts too much milk in but, no, this is perfect 

Vinny 

Now where was I?  Oh yeah....Violence. 

Im not a you know, what do they call it a macho guy. I'm not gonna go out looking for a fight. All my life I've avoided fights, I don't wanna hurt anyone and I don't wanna be hurt. I can truly say in all my life i've only been in 2 fights. The first one was in pre school, the 2nd in primary.. I don't believe in pointless violence...

(he flicks on the kettle to boil again)

But like I say...Violence is in our DNA, We've all got urges to harm people, for some its small and for others its bigger but its still there. and I don't think the most dangerous people are the chavs goin out on a Friday nights looking for a fight, football hooligans getting stuck in. no. The most dangerous are people like me. People who've never really had the chance to let loose, they let it build and build and build, until (pops his mouth) They snap. I've never had a reason to truly hurt someone before, but now I do, don't I?

The kettle gets louder and louder till it boils and clicks, Vinny picks up the kettle

With the kettle in his hand he walks and the camera pans to show the man he's been talking to. A small scared looking man, he's tied to a chair, with tape over his mouth. 

Vinny takes the kettle of steaming water and pours about a mug full on top of the guys head. The tied up man screams behind the tape covering his mouth. 

Vinny stands looking down at him, He's talking quicker now. 

Vinny 

Now I'm not daft. I know the people your working for are some hard motherfuckers. I know they've cut peoples arms off and shit and I know they've probably told you if you say anything they'll do the same to you. And that's shit for you, 

Vinny pours some more steaming water on the mans legs - he screams again 

Vinny

But...ya know, that's life. What do you expect working with a load of scum criminals?  You know what they say about playing with fire?

(he turns to Mike who's blowing on his coffee) 

Vinny 

You know what happens when you play with fire?

Mike

You get burned? 

Vinny 

(He turns back to the tied up man) Correct-a-mundo...You get burned

Vinny pours the rest of the steaming water all over the tied up man. 

His muffled scream is louder than ever, 

Vinny

(shaking the kettle) Time for a refill 

Vinny fills the kettle with water again and flicks it on, then stands next to Mike, drinking his tea. 

We see the tied up man sit in terror and pain

Vinny walks back over to him. 

Vinny 

Now I'm gonna take this tape off and if you scream I'm gonna go in them draws, find the sharpest thing i can and cut your tongue out. Then you'll have write stuff down to communicate, and I'll have to find a pen and paper, and it'll get blood everywhere. So its better if you just don't scream. Kapeesh?

He nods 

Vinny slowly peels off the tape, The man doesn't say anything 

Vinny takes another swing of tea and stares at the soaking man

Vinny 

.....You got any biscuits?

Tied up man

Err.... yeah

Vinny

......Caaan we have some?

Tied up man

err yeah 

Vinny 

Sound, where are they?

Tied up man 

In that top draw, ginger nuts

Vinny 

Oh I'll leave it then 

Mike 

I'll have a ginger nut 

Mike opens the drawer, gets the biscuits out and givens one a dunk into his coffee

Mike 

Hmm, nar these are nice, they're foxes. 

Vinny turns to mike and takes a biscuit and looks at it 

Vinny

These aren't ginger nuts, these are foxes crunch creams you mong 

Tied up man 

Oh, I don't fucking know, this shit fucking burns 

Vinny 

Yeah it will. Its boiling water pal (takes a sip) What's your name anyways?

Sam

Sam

Vinny finishes dunking and eating his biscuit - he steps in front of Sam and bends down to his level

Vinny 

Well, Sam, I'm gonna ask your where it is. And if you the words Know, don't or I come out of your mouth, I'm gonna pour everything in that kettle down your throat. Okay you ready?

Sam nods 

Vinny 

Where is it? 

Sam

I'm....unsure 

Vinny stands up in anger 

Vinny 

Wrong fucking answer (he clicks his fingers and points to mike) Hold him 

Vinny grabs the boiling kettle and Mike holds the mans mouth open. Sam tries to struggle but cant resist 

Vinny 

I know your scared Sam, Your boss will kill you if you tell us. But right know im the one about pour boiling water down your throat.

Mike holds his mouth open and Vinny leans the kettle more and more, steam covering everyone's face 

Vinny 

One last chance Sam, WHERE IS IT?

Sam 

Shelving Messing Only 

Mike 

The fucks he on about 

Sam

Its a what 3 words

Vinny 

You telling me the truth?

Sam 

Yeah 

Mike 

What in the what what? 

Vinny pulls out his phone 

Vinny 

Its this app, splits the world into 3 meter squares then gives them all 3 random words. 

What words did you say?

Sam

Shelving Messing Only 

Vinny 

Okay, and whereabouts is that? 

Sam 

Place called south wingfield

Vinny 

Yeah okay, this checks out 

Sam 

Its buried....not very far 

Cut to black